We all know that military personnel are held to a different standard than their non-military peers. The Uniform Code of Military Justice makes things that are socially scandalous in civilian life, like adultery, are actually a crime for military members. Other activities, like attending political events, protest rallies, or other events, are protected under the First Amendment of the Constitution for most Americans. The Constitution won’t protect military members who attend those events in uniform, though.
Bizarre US Military Crimes: Dueling and Drunkenness
Most importantly, there is a catchall article in the UCMJ that covers conduct prejudicial to good order and discipline, brings discredit to the armed forces, or involves violations of federal law that are not explicitly covered by the other articles. But what might surprise some people – military and civilian – are a few bizarre things that are mentioned specifically.
1. Article 114: Dueling
Article 114 of the UCMJ technically covers “endangerment offenses,” reckless conduct that is likely to produce death or bodily harm to another person. But specifically outlawed by this article is the practice of dueling: the old-timey act of defending your honor by going one-on-one with the coward who wronged you, also known as the thing that killed Alexander Hamilton.
There’s actually a good reason to specifically prohibit dueling between military members. There was a time when the practice of dueling reduced the number of Navy officers by two-thirds, which would wreak havoc on the Navy for decades to come.
2. Article 112: Being a Drunk Prisoner
It’s probably not a surprise to anyone that the U.S. military has an entire article outlining the punishments for drunkenness. If there’s one thing that young, junior enlisted people in any military, at any time in history, love to do, it’s drinking alcohol. There’s nothing wrong with taking a responsible drink, but to ensure it’s responsible, the military made a law about it.
What’s surprising is that the law specifically mentions that U.S. military members who are also prisoners and also happen to be drunk are subject to court-martial. So, for any member who might be incarcerated in the future: drinking toilet wine while in prison is just as illegal as whatever crime got you thrown in there in the first place.
Bizarre US Military Crimes: Hangovers and Faking Illness
3. Article 112: Being Too Hungover
We’re still in Article 112 for this specific mention. It shouldn’t be a surprise that being drunk on duty can earn a troop a court-martial. What might be a surprise is that being too hungover, or “as a result of indulgence in any alcoholic beverage or any drug, is incapacitated for the proper performance of duty” – is just as illegal as showing up drunk.
4. Article 83: Faking an Illness
The technical term for faking or exaggerating an illness for personal gain is “malingering.” In the case of the U.S. military, the personal gain is avoiding their duties. This article also covers faking a physical disability or mental illness to get out of work, too.
Most importantly, malingering includes anyone who intentionally injures or inflicts a wound on themselves to avoid service. Be it faking a stomach ache or shooting yourself in the foot, it’s probably best to just go to work.
Bizarre US Military Crimes: Jumping Ship
5. Article 87: Jumping Off a Ship
What Article 87 technically covers is any member of a unit who intentionally misses the departure of their ship, aircraft, or other movement, which causes them to miss their duty, either on purpose or through neglect. But just because a military member came aboard their vessel doesn’t mean they can jump off the ship and miss a movement that way. The UCMJ specifically mentions jumping off a ship as punishable by court martial, but don’t worry – it’s still legal for swim call.
Read About Other Military Myths and Legends
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